it happens in a blink

Brecken,

Today you are four years old. As always, I don’t know how we’ve reached another of your birthdays. These past four years have positively flown by. I really, truly feel like you were just an inside-my-tummy baby, and now here you are… almost 4 feet of opinions and needs, and hugs, and kisses, and “momma, I love you”. I loved you as a baby, you were the cutest thing I’d ever seen. But I absolutely adore you as a four year old. You’re the sweetest kid I’ve ever known, with the right amount of sass, a good amount of stubbornness, and the best head of hair a human being has ever had.

You are the best big brother. You and Jude playing together makes my heart sing in ways I couldn’t have even dreamed about before I had kids. You take care of him without us ever teaching you how to do so. There are times that you don’t want to share with him, initially. But as soon as you see how sad he is to not have what you have, you immediately, and without our prodding, give him whatever you have, just to make him happy. Jude thinks you hung the moon, you know.

You are so shy. So, so shy. Brecken, I’m sorry that we sometimes fail you because we don’t know what to do with you in a moment where you want to crawl into a hole. We don’t know how to walk the line between drawing you out of your shell to teach you confidence and independence, and not wanting to hurt your spirit by making you feel so uncomfortable. Daddy and I… are not shy. We don’t always know how to help you. We are so proud to be your parents, and we love you for exactly who you are.

This is your golden birthday. The one, golden birthday of your whole entire life. Daddy thinks golden birthday are absurd, but I think they’re pretty awesome. I don’t know if you’ll remember this birthday, but as each day goes by you remember more and more. (Just the other day you asked me about something happened when you were TWO. Something that we haven’t talked about since it happened. You never cease to amaze me.)

I can’t wait to see where your fifth year takes us. You’re going to do big things in this last year before school starts. These past four years have flown by in the blink of an eye.

Love you more-more,
Momma